There is an analogy about a room with walls and every time they are leaned against the walls give way. This makes the person feel very insecure. Each time they expect for something to support them and it doesn't they feel unsafe and unsure.
If the walls are stable and hold and support them they feel safe AND secure.
Make sure to set boundaries. Often times your kids are looking for them! You think they are fighting you but they want you to say no and stand firm. It helps them to understand how things work.
THIS MIGHT SOUND IRONIC BUT these walls also can make kids feel EXTREMELY FREE!!!
I know this is true from personal experience. I felt so free growing up.... so I wanted my kids to also feel that freedom... so what did I do? I gave them freedom, freedom to the point that I was suffering. I was being run ragged bc I was letting them do what they want in the BOUNDS that THEY want.
Then it dawned on me. I have the strictest parents I know. Out of all my friends growing up, they were the strictest. But then how in the world did I feel total freedom?
The walls were set in place. I didn't see them as bad because my parents didn't see them as bad. They made me feel safe secure and free!
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